So Good To Be A Failure Again

In addition to keeping this PERSONAL blog I do of course have my bio on the official White House blog over at http://www.whitehouse.gov/president/biography.html Back in October 2003 a fellow called George Johnston had the bright idea of linking to it using the phrase "miserable failure" and encouraging others to do the same. Pretty soon we had the number one google ranking for that phrase and it wasn't long before we got to be number one for the word "failure" as well.

Those were happy days for me. It was the first time in my life I had ever achieved something all on my own without any help whatsoever from daddy. It felt so good to finally be recognized as somebody special in my own right. There I was, the worlds biggest failure, sitting in the big chair at the White House making all the other failures in the world look insignificant and pathetic. It made me feel like SOMEBODY.

Then In January this year Google went and ruined all the fun. They said I didn't deserve to be up there and it was just a "google bomb" and they went and changed their algorithm so I got deprived of my natural place at the top of the failure list.

Let me tell you folks that hurt. Yes it did. People talk about all these silly injuries in Iraq. Just try getting shafted by google like that. That'll teach you about REAL pain. The day it happened I collapsed to the floor in a pathetic heap and screamed for Barbra for over an hour. Since then I have moped around the house, without hope, without the will to live. Then all of a sudden a couple of days ago I get this brainwave, a stroke of genius. What say we put the word "failure" on the front page of the Whitehouse site. Then Google won't be able to say those links are irrelevent any more.

So that's what we did and Voila, I'm right back at the top of the ratings again. Yee Haw.